The Fallacy of Parental Rights
I’ve been sitting on this one for a while. The phrase “parental rights” sounds innocent and well-intentioned. The argument is that parents know what is best for their child. In a busy world, something that causes parental involvement is a good thing.
I was at a meeting and the topic was a charitable foundation and steps to reduce poverty. Education was presented as a key way to help lift people out of poverty. In many inner cities in the United States, poverty impacts education which then impacts the ability to make a living, causing a cycle of poverty. The well intentioned speaker from the charitable foundation exclaimed that parents need to be more involved, that parents needed to be involved in decision making. The idea was that parents knew what was best for their children; allowing their voice was critical.
Unfortunately, the presentation lacked the nuance necessary to address parental involvement and parental rights. The most obvious detraction is that sometimes the cycle of poverty, especially in single parent households, create demands that hinder involvement. Then of course it begs the question, “Do parents actually know best?” Sure, parents might know a lot about their kids but as you hear them say so often, there is no manual. Except sometimes there actually is a manual. There are experts that are highly educated that have been trained in multiple fields that can bring their expertise to a host of situations. Parents often know their children better than anyone else, but knowing a child is not the same as being an expert in education, medicine, sexuality, or child development.
Think about the COVID-19 pandemic where suddenly so many became self pro-claimed experts and refused to listen to the actual experts. People were drawn to incorrect theories and medications that spread online but ultimately didn’t save lives. Many people rejected expert evidence-based guidance that called for social distancing and masking.
Parents should be involved in their child’s education. However, making decisions for their child’s school ignores that very idea of education. It simplifies the role of experts in society. Experts, of course, can be mistaken. Parents should be advocates, but they are not experts.
When we take a look at parental rights that are absolute, we ignore the rights of the child. We send a message that a child’s rights to the education, support, and development are less than a parent’s supposed rights. The parental rights movement has been hijacked lately by those opposed to education on sexuality, gender, and race.
It takes me back to that meeting. When I heard this idea that parents should make decisions, not charitable foundations, I was taken aback. I wanted to speak up but the room was filled with parents. It made me think of my childhood, where I hid my sexuality and my mother made poor decisions that impacted my well-being.
Charitable foundations should work with experts and of course involve parents. Parents should be partners contrasted with not having undue influence on schools to the detriment of education, diversity, and childhood development. Charitable foundations should be aware that absolute parental rights are a fallacy that are so often used to the detriment of children.
